Monday, July 3, 2017

My "reverse" all star ballot

I lost interest in the MLB all-star game a while ago.  Somewhere around the time it became the bro-fest, little league, everyone has to play nonsense I was out.  Then, you know, having to incentivize professional players to try to win – I was way out then.

But I loved it when I was a kid.  There was no inter-league play so seeing Jim Palmer against Joe Morgan was fun.  Seeing Roger Clemens against Tony Gwynn was fun.

I was actually at the ’77 game with my father.  I didn’t turn 7 years old until the next day (or later that night depending on which way you look at it) but I remember very clearly:

Dave Parker, Ellis Valentine, Dave Winfield and Reggie Smith having an impromptu pre-game throwing contest from deep right field to home plate.  Those gentleman, could throw – it was a sight to see.

Then Reggie Jackson, being Reggie Jackson went out and did the same – by himself when the AL took warm ups.

The game wasn’t much of a game.  That’s what happens when guys like Morgan, Bench, Garvey, Foster, Parker, Rose and Griffey play against guys like Zisk, Burleson, Wynegar, Fairly, Gross and Hisle.

I remember Dave Parker hit two line drive foul balls right by our seats and thinking that someone might die if they put their body in front of those balls they were hit so hard.

I remember how frigging HARD Goose Gossage, Tom Seaver, Dennis Eckersley and Jim Kern threw.  Years later this still makes me wonder about how many starters, if given the opportunity to throw one inning at max velocity against players who hadn’t seen them yet, how dominant could they have been?

That game (speaking of motivation and wanting to win) had Mike Schmidt who couldn’t play because of a thumb injury.  Schmidt showed up anyway in case Tommy Lasorda needed him to pinch run or stand in the on deck circle as a decoy.  I don’t see the Bryce Harpers of the world doing that.

But those days are gone.  And to me, so are the days of debating with your friends, who was more deserving of a vote – the guy having a career season or the guy who’s good every year.  Hanging chads are gone too.

So because of the above ramblings, I’m going in a different direction.  I’m going “reverse all-stars”.  These are the worst players at their position in each league.

Criteria: 175 plate appearances and 80% of your games played are at that position.

Caveats: I get you have to be good enough to be better than guys that can’t play regularly in order to be a regular player.  I get just by being in the major leagues means you’re a ridiculously good baseball player.  I’m just saying if you’re on this list, you may want to consider that your job security isn’t real solid.

Here are the worst players in baseball:

AL catcher: Jonathan Lucroy.  After all the trade deadline nonsense last year, a 0 (ZERO) WAR and .302 OBP this season.

NL catcher: Matt Wieters.  He’s the NL Lucroy. Zero WAR, .302 OBP.

AL 1B: Carlos Santana.  Used to be an impact offensive player.  Now is a weak link.

NL 1B: Adrian Gonzalez.  Can’t believe I’m writing this, as he was a bad dude back in the day.  He’s awful now. Awful.

AL 2B: Danny Espinosa.  Wow. Just wow.  Get the AAA 2B up now.

NL 2B: Jonathan Villar.  Another guy who used to be good but isn’t anymore.

AL 3B: Close – lots of choices here but I’m going with Nick Castellanos.

NL 3B: Maikel Franco.  Only 3B with a negative WAR and a .281/.376 OBP/SLG.  Is he even trying?

AL SS: Alcides Escobar.  To paraphrase Brock Lesnar: This guy had a rabbit’s foot stuck up his ass for a long time.  Luck runs out.

NL SS: Aldemys Diaz.  An all-star last year, the worst in baseball this year.

AL OF: Rajai Davis, Norichika Aoki, and Ezequiel Carrera.  Stiff competition from Alex Gordon, but…

NL OF: Carlos Gonzalez, Ian Desmond and Yasmany Tomas.  Still can’t believe people thought Desmond’s first 6 weeks last season were what he really was.  Tomas because I’ve seen him play twice and thought, “Wow, he might be the worst player I’ve ever seen.”  Turns out I’m close to being correct.  And Hunter Pence did his best to get his vote, but fell a little short.


Did I miss someone?  Tell me your vote…

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